#Pathlight : An Extraordinary Life by Annie Wenger-Nabigon
Author of Pathlight; Annie Wenger-Nabigon, MSW, RSW is originally from the U.S., earning her Canadian Citizenship in 2013. Annie & her Husband live in Pic River First Nation. Annie Wenger-Nabigon, MSW, RSW has been a cinical social worker since 1979 working in mental health, family therapy, and addictions services. She is a doctoral candidate at Laurentian University in Sudbury, ON. She works full-time as an Adult Mental Health and Addictions Therapist at the Marathon office of North of Superior Counseling Programs. Annie also works part-time as a consultant for LYNX, owned by her husband Herb Nabigon, MSW. Herb provides traditional Anishnabek teachings and healing workshops for both Native and non-Native organizations. Together he and Annie provide training and education to professionals on a wide range of topics blending mainstream and traditional approaches in healing. They also provide cultural safety and anti-racism training.
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Living our life in the ordinary moments is the rich filling between the emergencies and the celebrations. Life seems to be packed full of ordinary moments, yet humans are attracted to focus on the emergencies and celebrations. It takes a lot of work to enjoy the ordinary and do the daily tedious work of simply living well.
I’ve been blessed to know a lot of people in my life that I consider “extraordinary” – people who lived simply and in balance, who were not perfectionists, not famous or wealthy, not addicted to drugs, alcohol or gambling – in short, they were people who knew how to make choices to live an extraordinary life in an ordinary way.
I remember the lady who lived next door to me when I was a little girl. Her name was Stella and she seemed very old. She cooked her food on a wood stove, had a little garden behind her house, and never yelled at me when my little friends and I decided to sample some of the vegetables in her garden. She simply calmly and kindly explained that when we destroyed the things she grew in her garden she didn’t have them to sell in the market and make money she needed to live. Then she invited me and my little brothers to eat lunch with her one day, and showed us the beautiful rugs she made to sell at the market. This was how she lived her ordinary life – quietly making rugs and growing vegetables to sell. That was her only income. She was a widow who had no children, and her social life revolved around her church. We were always welcome in her home where we knew to be still and quiet and listen to the little stories she told us about life long ago.
When Stella died I was very sad. She has always had a special place in my heart for her kindness, her beautiful, gentle smile, and the permanent impact she had on my life and development. She truly lived an extraordinary life. It was not a life of comfort or fear. She never focused on those things, although I’m sure she had the same anxieties that come and go in life, as all of us do. She focused on governing her decisions by the choice she made to be a person who loved, who lived a life of high standards for herself and persistent patience for others. I can only hope that a bit of her influence is still present in my life.
When our lives are governed by emergencies and celebrations, and we never bother to show up in a good way in between, we miss the opportunity to be an extraordinary influence in our world. Stella’s world was a small one – her little church, a few distant family members, the little neighborhood we lived in – but she had a lifelong impact on many because she was present in the daily small ways. She didn’t just show up with flowery words or extravagant gifts at times of celebrations and empty words of comfort in times of emergencies. She showed up every day in quiet ways. We children knew Stella liked us, watched us, and was there for us, and that alone called us to try to behave and think of her and others – not just ourselves.
The habit of running away from hard things and uncomfortable things, and of running towards comfort and good times, can distract us from our finest and best. It is a habit that in the long run cuts us off from our extraordinary life. A habit of being consistently present for the people who are lonely, isolated, hurting, and withdrawn may require tedious, persistent patience and hard work at the little things. It is a habit that will build our character to an extraordinary level, and leave a lasting impression. Today I resolve to live an extraordinary life. I will not let fear and comfort govern my decisions! I will make compassionate choices to the best of my ability, and pray that others will also have compassion when my abilities fall short.
Annie Wenger-Nabigon, MSW, RSW
Pathlight@OntarioNewsNorth.com
ANNIE RECOMMENDS:
- The Hollow Tree by Herb Nabigon
- EldersTeachings.blogspot.com
- Pathlight: Journey to a Good Life archives
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