MS.Jan.14.09
It has become pretty clear that any hope of treatment options
before Dr.Crawford’s return is not realistic. I have decided to lower my expectations for what I am capable of doing around the house & with the kids and therefore, reduce the need for pain meds. Yesterday I chose not to go in for any at all after speaking with Dr.Brown’s (neurologist) office and realizing that the locum which I am dealing with during Dr.Crawford’s absense really doesn’t get it AT ALL. He took it upon himself to call Dr.Brown’s office and request an appointment for me without even discussing it with me; travel to Thunder Bay is dificult to me even when I am healthy so the idea that I would be able to handle a trip there now is ridiculous. He had the nurses at St.Joe’s very worried with his rants about being terribly concerned about the amount of pain meds I am taking… He completely missed the point that I get injections when my oral meds are not sufficient (so am not taking oral meds in addition to these) and of course so that I can still do all the things I usually do with my kids (ei. sliding, skating, going to Lloyd’s basketball practices, skiing) I can of course not bother with the injections if I am willing to pass on these activities. I have no problem dealing with pain, I can, like anyone else, put up with it; that means though that I cannot do many of the physical activities that anyone with a teen & a toddler does in a typical day.
It is so frustrating to realize that the locum heard NOTHING of my concerns regarding fatigue – this is another reason I am chosing to pass on my pain meds for the most part, I am tired of hearing his theory that my fatigue is caused by the meds so… NO MEDS = NO ARGUMENT, he will then have to accept that perhaps after 3 years of dealing with this illness, I may have a reasonable idea of what I am experiencing.
I did go in today for an injection, the cold weather (-44 this morning with the windsheild) is just too intense today and my backdoor with it’s huge gaps is letting some very bitter cold in making the pain in my lower legs just too intense. I was able to go back down to 4mg though having recieved my last injection Monday night and after recieving that realized I may be able to lower it even more. I am hoping that this will be sufficient to apease Dr.Habud’s (spelling?? the locum) obsession with my meds now that I know he has no intention of trying to order any treatment. In all honesty, I probably would not have been willing to accept this fact a week ago… Looking at the calendar though there are only a couple weeks left until Dr.Crawford’s return so, I’m going to suck it up, set my standards as to Emeraude’s activities lower and just deal with my restricitions until my real doctor is back.
I do realize that looking at the big picture, the fact that I now have a family doctor that I trust enough to wait for, confident that he will have more options for me, is huge, and I am very grateful for him having come to Manitouwadge. Dr. Brown’s office did offer a telehealth appointment for February which I am going to call and accept as I know Dr.Crawford will see this as a necessary first step towards chosing a new treatment.
SO, to sum things up, the next 2 weeks will be painful and not terribly exciting/useful but hopefully things will start falling into place from there.